10 Ways To Start Taking Control Of Yourself

At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) have nothing to do with one another. But many of us with ADD develop negative thinking patterns because we become frustrated by our challenges and frequent feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook then makes it even harder for us to manage those challenges and move forward.

Practicing positive thinking allows people with ADD to focus on our strengths and accomplishments, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time making progress, and less time feeling down and stuck. The following tips provide practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift into more positive thinking patterns:

1. Take Good Care of Yourself

It’s much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest. It’s like when you’re in a plane and the flight attendant is showing you how to use the oxygen mask, and that you have to put yours on first then you can help others. It’s the same in life, if you don’t take care of yourself first, then how can you take care of your family, friends, or your customers.

2. Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For

Stresses and challenges don’t seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are great in your life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference. Every day I take at least three times a day to think about my family, and all the great people that I have in my life. Thinking about what you’re grateful for at least three times a day for 60 seconds will dramatically improve your mindset.

3. Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions

A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member’s bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don’t waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless you have proof that there is something to worry about, and even if there is proof, OWN IT! Take control of the situation and move forward.

4. Refrain from Using Absolutes

Have you ever told a partner “You’re ALWAYS late!” or complained to a friend “You NEVER call me!”? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like ‘always’ and ‘never’ makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that certain people are incapable of delivering. I’m guilty of using these words myself, but I’m making a conscious effort to watch what I say. I want to uplift people and let them know that they can take charge of their words like I am. By removing those types of words from your vocabulary people will notice and appreciate you more, therefore elevating yourself to a whole new level.

5. Detach From Negative Thoughts

Your thoughts can’t hold any power over you if you don’t judge them. If you notice yourself having a negative thought, detach from it, witness it, and don’t follow it. Let your negative thoughts flow down a stream away for you like a leaf in water. Yes, they will show up, but it’s up to you to let them go and keep it moving. If you give negative thoughts the time of day, then your day will be seen as a negative day. Your negative thoughts need to roll off you like water off a ducks back. Shake it off!

6. Squash the “ANTs”

In his book “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life,” Dr. Daniel Amen talks about “ANTs” – Automatic Negative Thoughts. These are the bad thoughts that are usually reactionary, like “Those people are laughing, they must be talking about me,” or “The boss wants to see me? It must be bad!” When you notice these thoughts, realize that they are nothing more than ANTs and squash them!

7. Practice Lovin’, Touchin’ & Squeezin’ (Your Friends and Family)

You don’t have to be an expert to know the benefits of a good hug. Positive physical contact with friends, loved ones, and even pets, is an instant pick-me-up. One research study on this subject had a waitress touch some of her customers on the arm as she handed them their checks. She received higher tips from these customers than from the ones she didn’t touch!

8. Increase Your Social Activity

By increasing social activity, you decrease loneliness. Surround yourself with healthy, happy people, and their positive energy will affect you in a positive way! I like bowling, and so I enjoy social interaction at the bowling alley on league night. I get to talk and hang out with a variety of people from all walks of life. We’re all happy doing something we enjoy (and competitive), and laugh a lot. Make your social activity something you enjoy doing. There are a ton of things to get involved in, but one of the best places to find groups of people that share the same interest, and are generally positive and happy is meetup.com. It’s easy and free to find whatever interests you have.

9. Volunteer for an Organization, or Help another Person

Everyone feels good after helping. You can volunteer your time, your money, or your resources. The more positive energy you put out into the world, the more you will receive in return. I volunteer and help in an organization called Movember to bring attention to men’s health and men’s cancers. It’s an honor and pleasure to be a part of this organization. It makes me feel good that I’m helping out in any way I can and you should too.

10. Use Pattern Interrupts to Combat Rumination

If you find yourself ruminating, a great way to stop it is to interrupt the pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. Rumination is like hyper-focus on something negative. It’s never productive, because it’s not rational or solution-oriented, it’s just excessive worry. Try changing your physical environment – go for a walk or sit outside. You could also call a friend, pick up a book, or turn on some music.

When it comes to the entrepreneurial world productivity, time management and goal setting is pretty much the religion. To know the things needed to do are the basics of productivity, but interaction and having a steady mind makes up the entire thing to true productivity. These 10 strategies I hope will help to remind you that we have to stay conscious of what we’re putting out to the world, but also have time to decompress and enjoy our lives in peace with friends and family. Now, maintaining that balance is a hard challenge, and I wish you all the success in all you do.

 

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